Last night was the 4th of July, and for our
family it was a night of many firsts. It was my oldest son's first 4th of July
since returning from war, and it was my niece's first 4th of July without her
beloved husband. It was my nephews, aged six and two, first 4th of July without
their dear father.......it was a night of firsts.....
Events that
occurred last night led me to much reflection this morning, and I began to think
of shoes. There is a saying that one should not judge another until they have
walked a mile in their shoes....and I think the events that occurred last night
confirmed this.
On a beach in South Carolina, a group of young boys play
football during a firework show. It is possible that their loud cries, and their
activity irritated those gathered to watch the show. On that same beach a man
and woman were gathered....and had already consumed too much alcohol. The man
began to yell and curse at the children....frightening them...the mother and
uncle and aunt of the children rushed to their defense and a argument
ensued.
At this point in our story you may have come to some conclusions
of your own, some "judgements" for lack of a better word. Things such as "people
should not go out in public drunk"...or "the children should have been sitting
and watching the fireworks and not playing football"........
What is
know to us is the reason the children were playing, and not watching....the
reason was one six year old boy...who did not want to see the fireworks....he
lost his soldier father just a couple weeks ago, and the fireworks remind him of
his dad...they stir pain and sorrow in his heart, and he tries with everything
he has in him...to play it away....to shout..to run....to ignore the fireworks
and the display of patriotism in an effort to quiet the pain that has been
inside his heart since the very moment his mother informed him of his fathers
passing.
I imagine had the drunken man and woman known all these facts,
they would have never yelled at the children, they would have displayed
compassion and overlooked any irritation they might be feeling towards
them.......but they did not know the story....and they reacted in anger, in vile
words, and without even knowing what they were doing, they made the heart of
this six year old, already broken.....more wounded than before.
What we
do not know is why this man and woman reacted as they did. We can only
speculate, which leads me to an occurrence going on across the country, near
Seattle Washington the night of the 4th, where my oldest son and his friends
have gathered together. The fireworks are going off all around, the air is full
of the smell of gunpowder, and the sounds of the blasts from all directions has
a sense of gunfire, mortars and chaos.....they are all on edge, they distract
themselves with music and jokes, and alcohol, but the truth of the matter is,
they really are not enjoying this 4th of July, the memories are too fresh,
memories of real explosions, real gunfire, screams and wounds and death and
destruction...
Is it possible that the drunken man and woman may have
been dealing with the same issues? We do not know.....but what we can learn from
these experiences is not to judge others, to have compassion without requiring a
story...ask yourself always "why is this person behaving in this way"?.. "what
might they be dealing with?...what tragedy may have occurred in their life? All
we know is that these two drunken people ruined an entire families attempts to
escape some of the pain and just try and be "normal", if only for a moment.
Perhaps they were making the same attempt, for different reasons....we simply do
not know.
It is certain that this world needs more understanding and
compassion, more love and more hope, more people trying to at least imagine
themselves in another's shoes...even if only for a moment. Examine your own
life....have you suffered? Have you felt pain and sorrow? Have you lost someone
you love? Have you endured the fires of war? Have you been down and out with no
idea how you would buy your next meal?...Is it possible the person you are
judging, the situation in which you are allowing yourself to explode on someone,
is rooted in the same types of sorrow you have encountered? Everyone suffers,
some more than others, but if we as a people, can find it within our hearts to
overlook small things that irritate us, and reach out to people instead of
pushing them away, or attacking them.....just think of the stories we would
hear....and these stories would bring us together, in understanding, in
friendship and love.....when we fail to do this, we are filled with anger, and
judgement and we see only our own story and we feel the injustice of it
all.....and none of these feelings bring peace.
Originally published on Blogger, July 5, 2013