The book that sits by my bed right now is called "Pursue the Intentional Life" by Jean Fleming. The chapter I read today was called Romanticizing the Life of Faith.

   Jean speaks of watching a hawk soar in the sky above the mountains, and how it is the desire of her soul to soar always with Christ, to live her life well and for his glory.

   Then she asks a few questions.......

   Was Jesus soaring when he wept great tears of blood in Gethsemane?

   Did He soar when he pleaded with the Father for some other path?

   Was Paul soaring when he spoke in 2 Corinthians 1:8-9 of despairing of life itself?

   Did David soar when he pretended to be crazy and drooled in his beard, out of fear for his life? (1st Samuel 21: 12-13)

  She goes on to write of how we can often romanticize our Christian walk, as if to be a Christian means one should always soar above grief, discouragement, fear and pain and how when we do this we are perverting God's intention.

She speaks of King David and his writings in the Psalms,

" my heart is in anguish within me;"

"the terrors of death have fallen on me."

"fear and trembling have beset me."

"horror has overwhelmed me."

"I said, Oh that I had the wings of a dove."

"I would fly away and be at rest."

"I would flee far away."

"and stay in the desert."

"I would hurry to my place of shelter far from the tempest and storm."

 And how he ends with these words......." But as for me, I trust in You."

 "His love will not let me go. I find refuge in Him, and I soar. I soar in the growing knowledge and experience of God Himself...........The Lord meets me in my squall. Life's storms and stresses draw me closer to Him."

  Then she speaks of the Albatross, a majestic bird in flight, able to spend months and months at sea, this bird can reach an eleven foot wingspan and it glides above storm tossed waters. It NEEDS storm winds to keep aloft. In calm seas they are virtually unable to get airborne........and more amazing is their behavior on land, there they are called Goonie Birds, because they flop about in a most ungraceful manner.

 "Ironically, to soar I must taste my weakness and need. In the turbulence of life, I reach out to God."

 Our God knows us, He knows our weaknesses, He knows that we will not always soar on wings of eagles.

  She goes on to remind us that:

He gives strength to the weary.

He increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary.

and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the Lord

will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles.

they will run and not grow weary.

they will walk and not be faint.

  We will all have moments when we soar above it all, moments when we run this race with speed and vigor, moments when we walk, moments when we stumble, and moments when we fall.

 "even when I'm barely hanging on, trust that when there is almost nothing of me left, He will show up most powerfully."

She ends this chapter with this powerful prayer

 " Father God, please keep me from distorted ideas of what it means to walk with You. In my deep desire to live on the heights, keep me from romanticizing what that looks like. At this point, I think soaring is trusting that You can glorify Yourself through me no matter what. The only limiting factor is me, and glory of glories, You can use me in spite of myself, just as You have used other frail, flailing failures such as Jonah, Gideon, Peter and every other human You used through the ages. Grace, grace, amazing grace.

 When hard times come-----confusing times, faltering times-----encircle me with Your protective, sustaining care. Remember my intended wing and catch me up again on the strong currents of mercy and grace-----Your faithfulness, not mine, Your life in me. You know my weak humanity, and its not a problem to You. You prefer me weak and trusting so Your grace might be unfettered. Praise upon praise to Your Holy Name."

  We all struggle at times and as Christians we need to be real about life's struggles.

 The link to Jean Fleming's book:

	Pursue the Intentional Life: "Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom" (Psalm 90:12) ~ Jean Fleming (author) More about this product List Price: $14.99 Price: $10.83 You Save: $4.16 (28%)

Make me a channel of Your peace

Where there is hatred let me bring
Your love
Where there is injury
Your pardon, Lord
And where there's doubt
true faith in You

Make me a channel of Your peace
Where there's despair in life
let me bring hope
Where there is darkness, only light
And where there's sadness, ever joy

Oh, Master grant that I
may never seek
So much to be consoled
as to console
To be understood
as to understand
To be loved as to love
with all my soul

Make me a channel of Your peace
It is in pardoning that we are
pardoned
In giving to all men that we receive
And in dying that we're born to
eternal life

Oh, Master grant that I
may never seek
So much to be consoled as to console
To be understood as to understand
To be loved as to love with all my soul

Make me a channel of Your peace
Where there's despair in life
let me bring hope
Where there is darkness, only light
And where there's sadness, ever joy

  In all things there is always a choice. We lie to ourselves when we think otherwise. In my devotional reading this morning there is a quote that spoke to my heart. "I had to choose fear.......or completely trust Him. One cannot exist if the other is true." And in yesterdays reading there was another; "That which I refuse to thank Christ for, I refuse to believe Christ can redeem."

 Two very profound statements that hits me right where I am. Living between sorrow and fear, bouncing back from trust to sorrow, from sorrow to fear, back to trust........but is it really trust? For one cannot exist if the other is true.

 I have been a Christian for 24 years now, have read the Bible countless times, I know these things, they are written in my memory.....but are they engraved upon my heart? That is the question that God has been asking me, for weeks now. I am learning Lord, help me to hold on to what I learn.

 I am at peace, more so than I have been in some time. There is no need to fear tomorrow.

  When I fall into fear and worry, I am actually stating that I do not trust my Lord. When I agonize over what might happen, and how things do not seem to be going the way I think they should, or the way I would choose for them to go, I am stating that I do not trust that God knows what He is doing, that I do not believe that He is capable of redeeming things should they take the turn I fear.

 When I moan about the unfairness of things, I am stating that I am not where I should be, that the place God has put me is somehow wrong, that He has somehow lost control of things, that perhaps He was sleeping and did not intend for it to be this way. God has not been caught unaware of anything, and all that happens is allowed. I can not explain the why of it, I can only explain that God is good, He does not do wrong, so therefore there must be a purpose for it all.

 I can rejoice even in sorrow. For I know God will bring about good from all these things, He has promised me this, and one day, all that is wrong with the world will be made right, one day we will be reunited with loved ones gone to soon, one day His perfect love will forever cast out fear and sorrow. He has promised these things to those who belong to Him, He has promised good to me. He has promised good to His children.

He tells us to give thanks in ALL things........how often do we really truly consider what that means?

  It means we are to praise Him, in the midst of the storm, we are to praise Him, and we are to give Him thanks for everything! Thanks for the long hard road we have walked, we are walking and we may be walking for some time. Thanks for all the blessings that He gives each and every day. And we should ever ask Him to open our eyes, do not allow us to miss the gifts You give, do not allow us to fall into fear, or despair, to wallow in any kind of self pity. May we ever stand where we stand and may we wait for You Lord, without complaint, and in perfect trust. Your love is perfect, and perfect love casts out all fear.

Open our eyes Lord!

"give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."

"For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by Him we cry, ""Abba," Father."

"There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love."

 "In Japan the cherry blossom represents the fragility and the beauty of life. It's a reminder that life is almost overwhelmingly beautiful but that it is also tragically short. When the cherry blossom trees bloom for a short time each year in brilliant force, they serve as a visual reminder of how precious and how precarious life is. So, when Japanese people come together to view the cherry blossom trees and marvel at their beauty, they aren't just thinking about the flowers themselves, but also about the larger meaning and deep cultural tradition the cherry blossom tree."

 The beautiful song, Cherry Blossoms in Rain, when played on the piano, makes use of only the black keys. The dark keys, when the right fingers are touching them, makes something beautiful. Our sorrows in this life, if we trust God, if we live a life of thanksgiving, if we take the joy He offers even in the hard things, can be like the black keys on the piano, with His fingers upon them, something beautiful, something useful, something needful can and will occur.

Take a moment and listen to the beautiful song, "Cherry Blossoms in Rain" 

  Picture a dear one, someone so dear that you would willingly die for them; you would not even have to pause to consider it. Picture them struggling, hanging on to a sheer cliff, jagged rocks and darkness and raging waters below them. You claw your way to them, leaning down, desperately trying to reach them, desperately trying to pull them up to safety. You move huge boulders out of the way, you search with eagle eyes for the straightest path, and shout at the top of your lungs, go here, go there. You spend all that you have purchasing ropes, with special ties, with strong anchors, tossing them down, but none reaches them….some seem to come close, but your loved one will not reach out for them, they cling to the wall, sometimes they make a tiny bit of progress up, sometimes they slip and fall back, losing all ground they have achieved. You watch them beat against the rock; you see the blood on them, the wounds caused by the jagged edges of the sheer rock face they fight against. Others gather with you at the top of the cliff, shouting down words of encouragement, bits of advice, and pieces of rope……to no avail.

  You are willing to fling yourself right off this cliff, and die on the rocks below in order to save the struggling one….but you cannot….you are willing to take their place upon this sheer and brutal rock face, despite your desperate fear of heights…….but you cannot. You are willing to spend all that you own and be with nothing at all, to save them from this desperate perch…….but you cannot.

  A grim word picture, so far it is a desperate place to be, an uncomfortable place to be, but there is the unseen, that we must consider. The unseen, which we so often fail to consider. We in our desperation move heaven and earth in our efforts to change things, to save things, to save people we love, to make things right again, to redeem that which is lost, to give life to the dead and lifeless…….we beat our hands and our heads against the rocks in our attempts to do that which we are unable to do. It is not our place to be the change, to be the redeemer, to be the life giver, to be the restorer.  We (and I am speaking to Christians here) are to be people of faith, we are to live our lives in a manner that shows Christ and we are to depend upon Him utterly for everything. He is the Change, He is the Redeemer, He is the Life Giver, and He is the Restorer.

  As we open our eyes to these truths, we once again gaze down upon our word picture. We see the dear one hanging still upon the jagged rock face, their hands and face still bloody and sweaty from their efforts, their fingers clinched tightly to the rock, their limbs trembling from the weight of it all and from their efforts as they labor up an inch and fall back three………we see these things, but we also now see the harness wrapped about our dear one.  And as we gaze through the darkness that engulfs them, we see One standing upon the rocks, the Belayer, He holds the rope, the unseen rope, and we are now able to stand, to drop the many ropes we carry upon the ground, to cease from our efforts to clear a path, to stop shouting out words of advice unheeded……..we are able to let go, our love no less fierce than it was, but our faith renewed. It was never our task to save, it was never our task to heal, and it was never our task to restore…..it was always His.

  This dear one we watch struggle might be for some an actual person, it might be for others a life situation, a job, possession or situation that you are working with all your might to save or change. The principle is the same regardless of what your “dear one” is. Let go, unclasp your hand, loosen your grip, let it slide into the hands of the only One able to do anything of value with it. He will either deliver it safely to the top, to the place where you want it, or He will let it fall into His arms, either way, He is the Belayer, He holds the rope, the only rope……stop trying to take His place when you have not the strength nor the wisdom to see the big picture. He knows best and whatever He brings about, regardless of whether it is your will or not, will be that which is best.

 Belayer:

1) Someone who provides a belay

  Belay:

1) To secure (as a rope)

2) To make fast

3) To secure (a person) at the end of a rope

4) To secure (a rope) to a person or object

5) To be made fast

 "On the way to Jerusalem he was passing along between Samaria and Galilee. And as he entered a village, he was met by ten lepers,who stood at a distance and lifted up their voices, saying, “Jesus, Master, have mercy on us.” When he saw them he said to them, “Go and show yourselves to the priests.” And as they went they were cleansed. Then one of them, when he saw that he was healed, turned back, praising God with a loud voice; and he fell on his face at Jesus' feet, giving him thanks. Now he was a Samaritan. Then Jesus answered, “Were not ten cleansed? Where are the nine? Was no one found to return and give praise to God except this foreigner?” And he said to him, “Rise and go your way; your faith has made you well.”" Luke 17:11-19

  They stood at a distance!

 Leprosy required one to always stand at a distance from "normal" folks. As a leper, when you traveled you and came near people you were required to shout out 'UNCLEAN! UNCLEAN!" so that people could avoid you. You were an outcast.  A victim of leprosy was even excluded from God, he or she could not enter the temple, could not offer a sacrifice....for they were UNCLEAN!

   If a normal person touched a leper they would also be UNCLEAN! Leprosy stole everything from a person, absolutely everything, it took their bodies and their flesh, leaving them looking like monsters, it stole their dignity, it stole their humanity. It took EVERYTHING and was the most feared disease of that time. Better to just lay down and die than to be a leper.

 "And a lepercame to him, imploring him, and kneeling said to him, “If you will, you can make me clean.” Moved with pity, he stretched out his hand and touched him and said to him, “I will; be clean.” And immediately the leprosy left him, and he was made clean." Mark 1: 40

There’s a lot of pain but a lot more healing
There’s a lot of trouble but a lot more peace
There’s a lot of hate but a lot more loving
There’s a lot of sin but a lot more grace


Oh outrageous grace oh outrageous grace
Love unfurled by heaven’s hand
Oh outrageous grace oh outrageous grace
Through my Jesus I can stand

There’s a lot of fear but a lot more freedom
There’s a lot of darkness but a lot more light
There’s a lot of cloud but a lot more vision
There’s a lot of perishing but a lot more life


There’s an enemy
That seeks to kill what it can’t control
It twists and turns
Making mountains out of molehills
But I will call on my Lord
Who is worthy of praise
I run to Him and I am saved